Country income is in equilibrium if injection is equal to withdrawals. (y is in equilibrium if J=W)

A person is in balance when his yin is equal to his yang. In this world, humanely speaking that is, if we give and give and give, we become dry. If we take and take and take, we become bloated.

With these concepts in mind, it is exceptionally safe to assume that a person attains fulfillment when his life is in balance.

Balance. As God is in three forms- father, son and holy ghost, so are we who are created in His image- body, soul, spirit. Similarly, physical, emotional, mental. How alike are we in His image?

We fall short of his standard of holiness, we sin daily, cry out to Him and then sin all over again resulting in condamnation to hell at the end of it all. We're a self-destructive bunch of maniacs running around complaining and arguing politics and theories. We grief ourselves by comparing to others and look down at those who are not of the same standard as us. We claim to be one big loving family when the underground tradition is to gossip and backstab. There are so much of media how injustice in life is so easily justified because the character fought for it with super good shooting abilities and charisma and witty remarks, and at the end of it all, he gets some innocent lovely lady to be his wife after only that few moments of risking their lives for one another. No years of courtship and their relationship is smooth as marble. Our mentality gets more childish as our civilization ages. If you want to do it, then do it. If it makes you feel good, then do it. Casual sex is good? Then do it. Hop from one partner to another. The trend now is no longer monogamy.

No wonder this world is dying of AIDS.

What kind of supernatural being would want us other than to amuse himself with our sick and twisted behaviours and figure out more ways to bring out that beastly, disfigured dark side of us and find out what the most horrific thing mankind is capable of achieving is?

Which is why I will not give up on my faith and my religion. All religions teach world peace and compassion. But my life has never been so full of miracles since that night in the second Youth Alpha class when I spoke that prayer. I vowed once never to become a Christian but here I am, standing proudly as one.

Pride is a sin but...

If I've been cold to anyone these past few days, I got to say I'm sorry. I've been down, I've been boiling myself in self-pity and I've been making myself worry by worrying about the future. My life isn't balanced- school, church, personal. I've spent too much time on personal, too little on school and neglected church. Just like I've been stuffing up my body with food, give little thoughts to my emotions and ignored my spirituality. Balance, where is the centre point? I'm not sure, I'm trying to push through the fog and find the end.

But the fog's making me stumble and hit my nose (my poor nose! It's going to be flattened soon!) on tree trunks and branches. Caused some unwanted insects to crawl over me and so I've been sitting down, spending the last few days reflecting and thinking through my life.

There are people all over the world dying for Christ. And in the beginning, Christ died for us all. What am I doing here, simply taking the wide and broad path to eternal death?

Gotta backtrack. I need to get back up on my feet and find my way back to the path. Back to the beginning. Back where I look forward daily to spending one more day with that big big shining man up in the clouds, seated somewhere behind the sun and the moon.

How do we get true happiness? When happiness comes from within us, when we put our sanity and trust onto one thing that's firm. Humans have only two legs and no tail, one hurricane, one fall, they die. Relationships are complex, they can give great pleasure, they can also give great pain. But whoever trusts in the Lord will be saved for He is the same yesterday, today and forever.

God is fair. Each of us lack something but we are also gifted in other things. And since God is fair, life is fair too. It's a matter of perspective. As the turtle and the pig once said, being lost just means finding another way of getting to the destination. Positive thinking. And when we do so, we want the best out of our life just as we take up insurance plans to get the best out of our money. Wanting the best of our lives means looking for true happiness. And based on the top equations, it is being balanced.

True happinesss=body+soul+spirit=physical+emotional+mental

If the body(physical) is weak, to attain true happiness means adding more to the soul and spirit, emotional and mental. Get the equation?

After such a long long composition that was solely meant for me to work out my thoughts and seperate the truths from the excuses (er. and also to be of some comfort to myself)...I hope I make sense. >.> It took me sooo long just to get to this point. So many hours of observing, of reading, of recalling past experiences and of thinking...and listening attentively in Macroecons class, they're worthwhile. ^.^My life needs a focus point. So many of you have been encouraging me and I've been quiet because I was still self-pitying.

If the Lord decides to that I am to screw up my dance, then so be it. If the Lord decides that I am to be at the bottom of my school, then so be it. If the Lord decides that I am to be backstabbed, scorned and surrounded by people whom I do not like, then so be it. If the Lord decides that my family will go into financial crisis, then so be it. If the Lord decides that I am to be abandoned by Him, NO LORD! I WILL BE A GOOD GIRL!

It's time to get up on my feet now. Let's check if I have any fractures.

P.S Do not ever try TPIT Foodcourt Laksa. The coconut milk is stale, the portion is small, the cockles are raw and you will find, floating in your bowl, 2 prawn heads with only 1 prawn body. And it costs $3!!! Guaranteed to cause a stomachache. This is based on personal experience. -_-